How to Escape A Forced Marriage
by IrishDreamer4
Summary: Oneshot AU. Fem!Hiccup. Hanna is forced to marry Alaric after Stoick found out about Toothless. Her future seemed bleak...but the Gods may provide the answer to her problem.


"Get those decorations up! Fetch the flowers! Prepare the food! Bring out the wine!"

Stoick yelled and barked and shouted and roared all over his village, giving out orders.

A wedding was taking place. But it was no joyful event.

"Stoick," Gobber waddled over the chief, pleading desperately. "Are you sure ya know what cha doing?"

Stoick stopped what he was doing, or rather screaming. He fell silent, heavy in thought.

His daughter, his only child, was earlier exposed for training dragons. A Night Fury of all things.

He had to make haste.

"Hiccup is not a Viking. I need a heir and Alaric is that heir. I can't wait until Hanna is old enough for marriage any longer. They need to get married, **today."**

"There are other options to settle this mess, that involves _talking to yar daughter_."

"I can't even look at her anymore. Not until the ceremony is over."

Gobber stepped in his way.

"One more thing." He looked disgusted. "Does **Hanna** and Alaric _have_ to consummate the union? They're only 14!"

"The marriage needs to be solidified. Otherwise it can be annulled. Now come on, we must prepare the ceremony."

As Stoick walked off, Gobber sighed, believing himself to be the only one who could see tragedy from this mess.

* * *

At the chief's house, his daughter was locked up in her bedroom, waiting for her wedding to start. Hanna stared out of the window, sadly watching the villagers prepare for a wedding she never asked for.

Tears leaked from her eyes. Sharp gasps croaked from her throat.

Trapped. Alone. Ignored.

And now she was going to lose the only friend she ever had and married to a boy who never showed her any kindness.

 _ **BANG!**_

Hanna jumped as her bedroom door was kicked open, courtesy of Berk's craziest girl Viking.

"Up and at them, Mrs Hofferson! Time to get ready!"

Ruffnut stomped herself in, carrying bridal clothes. Her twin brother followed suit, standing guard at the door.

"Gotta get you look good for Alaric!"

Hanna sighed, turning away. Her bangs shielded her tearstricken face.

For the first time ever, Ruffnut spoke gently. "What's wrong? I thought you like him."

"I do...just...not like this."

"Tell us, what's it like taming a dragon?" Tuffnut asked.

"Well...it's kinda like taming a wild cat. Only bigger." Talking a bit of her life changing experience cheered her up slightly.

One word uttered from the twins.

"Cool..."

"Riding a dragon is so much cooler than killing one."

"Imagine making beautiful destruction on the back of that Night Fury..."

But Toothless was caged and ready for death.

The tears came leaking back.

"You're so lucky, Hanna, to have a dragon!"

"What a gift! We must make this wedding as divine as the Gods!"

The lightning of an idea hit Hanna.

"The gods...that's it!" She turned around fully, smiling to hide her planning. "Of course, a Gods' wedding would've involve a prank by Loki."

Predictably, the twins went crazy over the mention of Loki.

"But of course!"

"What would our patron god do on such a occasion?"

"Food poisoning? Termites? Boar stampede? Wearing yellow after Snogglehog?" Tuffnut suggested.

"I have an idea."

The twins looked to Hanna.

"Just hear me out. What if one of you pretend to be me throughout the ceremony? Wear my dress and veil, and no one will notice until the end. It's just like when Thor pretended to be Freya to retrieve his hammer from the giants and then he killed them all."

A grin grew on Ruffnut's face. "That's not a bad idea."

"Can you imagine the look of everyone's face when Alaric sees Ruffnut's ugly mug instead of Hanna's beautiful, freckled face?" Tuffnut said, practically drooling.

"I was thinking it should be you, Tuffnut."

"WHAT?!"

Ruffnut burst out laughing of the idea whereas Tuffnut frowned with added confusion.

"It's just that Alaric marrying a guy instead of the chief's daughter or any other girl would be much more hilarious."

Realisation dawn on the twins.

"She's right."

"You are an evil genius! Why aren't we best friends and planning destructions together?

"Because you thought I was a weak loser since we were 5."

Tuffnut actually looked guilty. "Oh right. Hmph!"

Suddenly, Ruffnut pounced on him, tearing off his clothes and replacing them with Hanna's bridal dress. Once done, she spun her brother around to face the mirror, to which he grinned at his reflection.

"Wow. This dress really hides my thighs."

"A prank worthy of Loki." Ruffnut said as she weaved tiny roses into his hair, gathering his long locks back.

While the twins pampered Tuffnut for his role, Hanna secretly snatched Tuffnut's clothes.

She smirked. "I'll wait here until you say 'Loki'd'."

Or at least, sneak out to get her hammer.

Metaphorically.

* * *

In the arena, Toothless was all locked up. Over a dozen chains were looped around him and his head was in a stick for extra measure. Despite his heavy chains, the Night Fury trashed violently about, furiously desperate to break free and find Hanna.

The last he saw of his human friend was getting dragged off by the arm.

By her father.

The very remembrance of the man brought Toothless into another fit of anger.

"Oh man...I still can't believe it. We got a Night Fury!"

Toothless snarled at the ugly boy smirking at him. An axe was fondled in his grubby hands.

"It's head will good great as a helmet-"

"Don't even think about it, Snotlout!"

Alaric. The blond brat who dragged Hanna from the cove before she could escape with Toothless.

Said dragon liked him just as much he liked Stoick.

"Hanna will give the final blow after the ceremony." Alaric stated firmly.

"Oh come on! That little traitor?" Snotlout whined childishly.

"She brought it down. It's only right that she finishes the job. This will be the push she needs."

"I guess...Hey, when the wedding is over, the guys and I will take you on the greatest stag party ever! We'll drink barrels, throw some sheep, hook up with some hot wrenches-"

"You do realise that I'll be married by then?"

"To Hiccup? Ha! You'll be sneaking off every night to a real wo-"

A fist met his face, followed by several more punches beating him down.

After some time, Snotlout was laying on the dirt, beaten to a bruised pulp, with Alaric standing over him, his fist shaking.

"Any more jabs about my soon to be wife and I will gut you like a fish and feed your intestines to the Night Fury. Got it?"

Snotlout whimpered in agreement.

Drums played to signal the beginning of the ceremony.

As Snotlout staggered off, Alaric bid the Night Fury a star in the eyes before leaving, shaking the jealousy out of himself.

"What does she see in that thing anyway? It's not even cute."

Moments went after the boys left. Moments passed as Toothless grew more agitated.

Then that stupid twin boy came running in. Toothless snarled dangerously, until his nose caught whiff of 'his' sweet, familiar scent.

The boy knelt beside the dragon and took off his helmet

"Hey, bud." Hanna smiled.

Toothless happily licked her over and over, ignoring the smell of Gods-knows-what on her disguise. She grabbed hold of his head, hugging him close.

"I'm gonna get you out of here."

She took out a single dagger from her boot, quickly set to work on the lock. Years of working with metal had its perks, such as learning the art of Lock-picking.

The locks sprung free. Toothless practically bounced out of his cage and lovingly nuzzled Hanna, making her giggle.

Then she pulled herself into his saddled back, ready to fly out...

Soft growls halted them.

Hanna turned around, noticing the other dragons locked in their cages.

She got lost in thought, her face slowly gaining an expression of firm determination.

* * *

The ceremony was going rather quickly, considering that the dialogue was cut down to get the young couple married as soon as possible.

Alaric stood at the altar, his back straight, hands behind, shoulders out.

At his right, his 'bride' stood in a glorious white, her veil completely hiding her face. In her hands held a bouquet of pink roses.

Yet he couldn't help but notice something wrong with his 'bride', not paying the slightest attention to the officiator.

"Do you, Alaric of House Hofferson, Son of Odin, take Hanna of House Haddock, Child of Chief Stoick, Daughter Frigga, as your lawful wedded wife 'til death do you part?"

The officiator didn't even bother to ask 'Hanna' if she wanted to take Alaric as her husband on her part.

On Stoick's orders.

"I don't remember her being this bulky..."

The wedding dress made her look fat.

"Alaric?" His father spoke up.

And then, he realised the truth.

"Wait a minute...Hanna would've said something by now. She never shuts up!"

In one swift move of his hand, he ripped the veil right, revealing the grinning face of _Tuffnut_!

"Loki'd!"

Everyone present at the wedding burst into screams. Some even fell off their chairs.

Ruffnut walked up to her brother, the two of them crackling.

"I can't believe you two, Loki'ing right now!" Fishlegs wailed. "On such a special occasion! Have you no shame?"

"A divine wedding is the crown jewel, Fishlegs. When you get a shot like that, you have to take it." Tuffnut merely explained.

"I don't care, just get Hanna!" Stoick roared.

"Relax, Chief! Hanna waiting in her room until we're done." Tuffnut explained.

"Yeah. She was the one who told us about Thor pretending to be Freya to get his hammer back." Ruffnut followed.

Stoick fell silent at that.

"Hanna?" Gobber uttered. " _Hanna_ gave you the idea to Loki'd the wedding? Oh Thor...That girl is an evil genius!"

"She sure is." Ruffnut noted.

And then, Stoick spoke again.

" _ **FIND HER!"**_

* * *

The village searched high, low, all over for Hanna. Every building, every tree, every rock. But nothing.

"We looked everywhere. No sign of your daughter."

Stoick groaned. "Where could she be?"

"What about the Night Fury? Hanna seemed rather attached to it." Gobber suggested.

The old weary eyes of the chief widened as dread fell upon him. "The arena!"

Led by the chief, everyone ran to the arena. Putting the chief's daughter in the same place as a dragon grew to be a very bad idea. Remembering how the Night Fury protected her against the Monstrous Nightmare made the Vikings even more edgy with rattled nerves.

The masses barely reached the opening of the arena when they heard dragons roars and a girl's voice.

"Let's go!"

They found Hanna on the back of the Night Fury, flying out of the arena, followed by the Gronckle, the Deadly Nadder, the Hideous Zippleback, and the Monstrous Nightmare.

All eyes stared after the flying serpents and the runaway girl, unable to stop them.

Hanna gave one last look at the island she was born on, the house she was raised in, the people who treated her like dirt.

"Hiccup!" Her father called frantically, waving his arms and even jumping around.

She winced. The tears came back.

"Hiccup!"

He wasn't even using her real name.

Sadly, she turned away. Toothless grumbled, trying to comfort her. She patted him, smiling a little.

"HICCUP!"

She and the dragons disappeared into the clouds, off to discover new lands, meet new people who are open-minded, and maybe find a new home.

Leaving her old life behind.

Stoick halted his yelling once he lost sight of them. His anger dissolved, fading away. He became silent, appearing almost fragile to touch, as if he could break apart into a million pieces.

He had just lost his only child. Just like when he lost his wife.

"Hanna..." He whispered.

Alaric felt the same way as the chief. He had lost his only chance to be with the girl he loved for so long.

Silence fell upon the village.

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"Uh, now that Hanna is gone wearing my clothes, does that mean I can keep the dress?"

" _ **SHUT UP TUFFNUT!"**_

"I'll take that as a yes."


End file.
